At 4am this morning I was woken in my marital bed by something hard and pointy poking into my back.
And, NO it’s not what you’re thinking, you saucy minxes.
In fact, It was a viking helmet. And by viking helmet, I actually mean a viking helmet, and a three foot sword. Both attached to a very awake Devilboy who desperately needed to tell me extremely urgent news that couldn’t possibly wait until daytime.
“Mama, I’m a magic viking!”
“But, it’s the middle of the night!” I growled (having just fallen back to sleep after being exuberantly roused by Devilette for the seventeenth time).
“Yes I know mama, that’s the magic part!”
Thought for the day:
“Poo cannot dance because it does not have feet. Wee does not have feet either. But, a train poo goes along the track. Interesting.”
Taken from A Postmodern Manifesto – The Collected Works of Devilboy – abridged version.
Genius really. Move over Heidegger, there’s a new philosopher in town.
”Mama, I don’t like Wiggle Bix, can I have Corn Flames for breakfast?”
Sure honey, once I work out what in the name of fuck a Wiggle Bix actually is and find time to call Kellogs to ask when and where they plan on launching their first chilli flavoured breakfast cereal.
Alternately, you could eat some toast.
Dad of Devilboy: “Did you have fun with mummy today?”
Devilboy: “Actually, we killed Zombies with lasers.”
I think my husband may now be quite concerned with my parenting skills.
My darling Devilette is quite the Devilboy doppelganger.
Here she does a stirling impersonation of her brother as a baby. 🙂
She’s definitely got the same looks, but here’s hoping she a tad less insane.
Most boys ask for a pet dog at some point in their life. Not Devilboy.
He has requested a pet dragon.
“A black flying dragon. That I can ride in the sky. With Fire. And nice, not mean. From the dragon shop.”
Well duh, where else would you purchase a dragon? I’m sure the local Westfield has several.
Jeez, I just hope they haven’t sold out.
Devilboy has a new piano, and by piano I mean piece of plastic crap that has a keyboard and makes a lot of noise, and has been busily churning out some sensational new compositions of his own this evening.
Standout lyrics include;
“I love you daddy and that’s just the way it is!”
“Mummy is my best friend except for Finny who is really my best friend.”
And my personal favourite,
“Baby sister, baby sister, you cry a lot… can I lick you?”
Top 40 here he comes.